Monday, March 31, 2008

just kicking back

Isn't there many a time, you sit around thinking that you're so alone, that at times of being totally kicked in the teeth and writhing on the ground with the insane behaviour of business partners, friends, family...( you get the picture), that who would be the one person to save you, to call, to scream at, to vent, to cry on, there was no one, no one but you. I have lived with my aloneness for four years now, four years of getting back on my feet, of keeping it together, of rebuilding my life, of reshaping the relationships I've had, am having will have. I've watched, I've listened, I've walked away from and I've stood my ground, and I keep thinking it's going to get easier, it's almost there, but the question is, when do you know ? when do you know it's the right time to date, to start your own business, to leave the past behind, to sell the car? I feel like I've been stumbling through the last four years and finally the Epiphany of my past behaviour, relationships and state of mind, hit me, like a thousand rain drops falling from the storm clouds above my head.  I am the master of my own universe, my life is in my hands, I shape my own world, what am I waiting for? Nothing.  Because everything is waiting for me.  

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