Out of the Rabbit Hole and into the LIGHT! YIPPIEEEEE!

"You're so bloody stubborn!" says my bff Peggs over the Phone,
"Yes , I am, look at the dictionary under Dx and it says stubborn cow" . I say
"You know it's for the best right, just get it over and done with" . Says she who's never gone through chemo but loves me anyway
"No friggin way, after the last round (my 7th cycle) there is no way I'm going to go through that again, it's my body, and it's my decision, the end" . I grit out mulishly
"Come on Dx " she says
"I don't want to talk about it, So when are you coming over to visit " I say changing the topic very very quickly
"sigh... let me check my diary, hopefully April" she says

We chit chat a bit more and I know she's not really going to let it go but as I said, I just didn't want to talk about going to do another cycle , or going through the horrible experience like the last time, the nausea, the vomiting the stomach spasms,  aches,  the weight loss and weakness.  I was done.  Did you hear me DOC, I'm done!!!

Yes I did tell the Head Nurse and Doc about my decision, Doc said "Dx, we're going to give you an extra week, you're anemic and obviously need to rest but reconsider please, the dose won't be as strong because of the weight loss and this is the final cycle, lets kick it in the arse" ( I know who I want to kick in the a@#$.. humpf)

A couple of weeks later I'm in Hospital, having my final cycle of Chemo, I told everyone I'd be partying in between the chemo drips, bring on the disco balls and the non alcoholic dwinkies, we'll boogie down till we get told off or fall in a faint on the beds.

PAHHHHTTTAAYYYY

Yeah that was all in my head, I was making like the bestest of the best patient so they'd let me out pronto.  Which they did.

After that it was regular blood transfusions and blood tests to ensure I was ticking along, my final P.E.T scan was in the second week of May, and wouldn't you know it, during my transfusion, my temperature sky rocketed .  Doc walked past me and said, "we're admitting you Dx, gotta find out what that infection is"... LURVERLY, I just love being in hospital.. NOT.   Anyway, fast forward a week later, I'm sent home and am recuperating with bi weekly visits to the Doc until the P.E.T Scan happens.

Talk about a cliff hanger, I had the P.E.T scan (more of the "take a deep breath and hold please,  now breathe normally..)  but had to wait for another week before my oncologist talked to me about the results. anxiety much?   Results day came pretty fast and...... I'm in REMISSION!!!! oh yes I beat the beast folks.  (I would try to do a jig but the body ain't up to it YET)

WAZZUP DOC

What a long road it has been, but the Doc says, "Now's the rebuilding and recuperation period.  You have to watch out as you're aware your immune system is still weak, you have to start an exercise regime to rebuild the muscles that have all gone, (ya do you know where my bum has gone? I seem to have lost it)   you have to start eating properly to gain weight and you have to stop stressing."
   "Can I travel?" I ask hopefully.  He shakes his head, "because the tumour on your lung is taking it's time disintegrating, you'll have to wait till it's gone completely, it's just a dead lump (charming) right now. (He gives me the "look")  We'll talk about radiology in a couple of months time.  Booooo. Oh well as long as I'm healthy and there's no more chemo , everything is blue skies and sunshine.

So because I can't be in large public spaces I spend a lot of my time at Bloomhill Cancer Care.  I have my Art Therapy Classes on Wednesday

as well as  Group Meditation :

Meditation Room  this is a link to the video (for some reason I can't upload it here)<--- br="" link="" nbsp="" to="" video="">

Today however I did a workshop that is provided by the LOOK GOOD FEEL BETTER program, I had been given their leaflet when I was going through Chemo at the ADEM CROSBY CENTRE but just wasn't up to it.  Last week the girls at Art Therapy class egged me on so I called up and attended their workshop. Hey, I'm bald, no eyebrows and no eyelashes what have I got to lose?  (Please do not ask about hair in other places like some of my friends do... :-p )

It was a two hour workshop to show us how to take care of our skin, do our make up and to try out some wigs, scarves and caps by they two lovely ladies from The Look Good Feel Better Team

Mary is on the Right and she's the one you'll be dealing with when you book in QLD

All this Skin Care and Make Up once we've tried it on is for us to take home,!

And since we loose our hair, the wigs, scarves and caps are a welcome part of the workshop

After the two hours, I'd learned a lot , not only about Looking Good and Feeling Better but also the women around me who were going through or had just finished Chemo just like me.  Knowledge is power, the more you enquire and talk the more you find out.

So with that I've decided to start vlogging about simple recipes for our shattered taste buds, and tips from my cancer experience.   I'd love to give back to society as they've loved and supported me during my protocol.   I've just got to set up a crowfunding site to purchase the equipment etc.   If you have any suggestions, I'm all ears... hairless ones that is . Ha Ha Ha Ha
Dx

Down the Rabbit Hole - Dodgy Daph's Medical Adventures pt 3

Well when they say the sun will always rise and moon will always shine and the stars will come out at night, "they" are not wrong.

I woke up to yet another  new room mate.  This was the third one so far (bleedin heck what am I a permanent fixture?) . anyway his name is Harry, he's in his 80's and he's got a wicked sense of humour.

I decide to leg it for a "real " latte before "coffee man" gets ahold of me,  and asked Harry if he wanted one,  "a chailatte" please he says.  Oooeerrr very new age of you Harry.  As I return to the ward after nodding and greeting all the nurses and students, I'm unfortunately "caught out" by coffee man as I am about to step into my room.  "Oh, two coffees is it, dunno why you'd go pay for those when you get them for free here"... I am mortified, I didn't want to hurt "coffee man's feelings" . so I said,  "it's a lattee.."  He says "I can make them too! This is a 15 hundred dollar machine, it makes everything, I can even do espresso's..."  Suitably chastised I promise him I'll try his latte tomorrow.  I hand over the Chai Latte to Harry who's grinning at me, naughty man.  The Nurses come in and asked him how he slept, he said "I didn't sleep a wink what with Dx snoring away all night" . The CHEEK!  The nurses fall over laughing.

Annie comes in to take me downstairs for lunch, and as we're about to tuck in, I get a call from the Insurance Agents of AIG.  They're sorry to hear about what's happened, can they have some details and can I send it to them.  I look at Annie, I guess I must be a one stop admin centre eh, will have to dig through my e mails now.  We head back up to my room.  The doctor comes in to visit and says "I know you'd like to be discharged today Dx but we'd like to monitor you since there's been a slight increase in the fluids in your lung after the biopsy."  I look at her like I've been sentenced to prison.  "However we can give you a day pass for the weekend, you can go home for the day but you'll have to be back here by 6pm ok?"  OH YES!! (cue : zippie de doo dahhh zippie de day)

The next few days was a small slice of heaven,  I'd get picked up either by Annie or Max and deposited home, get to cook some real food and be back in the ward in the evening.  "all right for some " grumbled Harry,  'well at least you're taking it for the team" he says.   However on one of the last days of my day pass, I get a disturbing call from the AIG insurance agent, this one is not the lady I spoke with.
 He's rude and abrupt and says "your insurance is void". 
I blanched , "I beg your pardon?"
Ya you didn't buy the insurance while you were in Malaysia , so the insurance is void.
 I said " well first of all , it doesn't state anywhere on your website that it has to be purchased from country of origin, and secondly why did you take my money if it was not going to be in effect?"  "You better write in to the company and explain then " he says and rings off.
 This then sets off my anxiety and so I ask the kids to send me back to the hospital early.  I spoke with the doctor and told her what had happened, she told me to engage my solicitor and also would get the social worker on to me.  She reassured me again, not to worry, most important thing is for you to get better, the finances will get sorted out later.
I've got a PET Scan and and echo scan to go through and then I'm done with the tests. 

Rejection... oh the pain

The PET scan is similar to a CT except you are injected with radioactive glucose so the cancer cells are illuminated when you're scanned.  As I'm wheeled in to the room again I have to tell them my name and birth date.  For GOD"S sake, does everyone have to know my age! I tell them.  In the back ground one of the orderlies pipes up, "it's ok, I like older women"!  Cheeky but I'll take it.

The Echo is like a sonar to check my heart (yeah yeah get on with the jokes about a bleedin heart will ya... everyone is a comedian) and it takes about half an hour with a technician who goes over certain spots to catch the readings. Because we're so close to each other I can hear her tummy rumbling, she laughs and apologises, "must have been something I ate, it's just going off isn't it!"... Well better you than me !!  Then I'm wheeled back , another orderly cracking jokes, so much so that we end up on the maternity floor !  I'm looking around and saying "hang on this does not look familiar at all" and the Head Nurse says "having a baby are we ?"  everyone cracks up and the orderly is shown the way back out to the lifts and down to where my ward is.  Phew. adventures abound even in hospitals.

They're going to discharge me, Annie is calling to see what time I'm to be "sprung", I have to speak with the Hematology Team, who are still keeping pretty stumm on my diagnosis.  So I asked the attending Doctor, "seriously though, you say it's suspected lymphoma, can we confirm that it is?"  and this was his cryptic reply,  "sometimes when we see a shadow of a cat , it's a cat, but if you go around the corner it's a dog".... I look at him and hold my self back from strangling him.  He gives me a benign smile, one that says " I know what you're thinking but you can't do anything about it!"  HAH!  Anyway, the tests will take longer, some of them are in Brisbane, so I'm to go home and the week after I'll be called in to the Adem Crosby Centre to meet with my oncologist to discuss the results and treatment moving forward.  Right e o, Feeedoommm , Freeedoooommm, Freeedooommm (George Michael sing it bebeh)

Whilst I'm home I have to update all my family on what's going on so far, yes everyone is frustrated because there has been no definitive diagnosis, but this is the calm before the storm.  I go back on my daily walks, I start the budwig protocol and do as much research as I can regarding lymphoma, diet and lifestyle excluding the "woo woo" theories out there.  I'd love to try alternative therapies as opposed to chemo, but a lot of them are integrative and can be done here.  Ok, we're getting some where. 

I get my organic flaxseed oil from stoneycreekoil.com.au

Annie and I have a quiet drink together, she say's "I miss my drinking buddy!"  lol, yea no more martinis for now until we figure out what the hey ho is going on.  Annie's already taken me to the Cancer Support group in our area.  She says " Daph, we need to set up a "go fund me" account to help you out." "if the insurance folk and not coming into play how are we going to sort your finances out, you can't work, your daughter is stressed out as it is with her job and your son is still in school".  I look at her " Not charity Annie, I don't want charity, can we just wait and see how this pans out.?"  Eventually she gets back to me and says she's going to pledge to cut her hair to raise money for me.  My eyes pop, "are you kidding me?!! all that long blond hair??!!"  "I do it for you my friend, I want to pay for your rent and if this helps than I' m doing it"   I of course start to blub like the big girls blouse that I am, who else would do this for me  who else? : Down-the-rabbit-hole-with-Daphne

Goldilocks!

To date : Annie's launched "down-the-rabbit-hole-with-Daphne  Go Fundme, a few days ago on my FB timeline, she's organising a radio interview with the local radio station here and is hoping to build more traction with some of the other cancer charities.   I'm leaving you with the link https://www.gofundme.com/down-the-rabbit-hole-with-Daphne as I promised her I would write about it in this blog, we were going to cut our hair together but I've had to cut mine off as it started falling out in clumps so hopefully we'll be able to do a real "event" out of Annie's hair cutting ceremony.
If anything to auction off your hair for cancer is a HUGE deal.  Thank you my dearest friend. X
In the mean time my lovely friend and lawyer  Daljit is hounding the AIG insurers, apart from an official letter to state they won't be honouring the insurance, they've been rather quiet and not responding to either the Hospital Admin or my lawyer. 

It's a lotus flower 

This blog is not current to timelines, it's a way for me to express what I went through leading up to what's happening in real time.  But that's a story for another day...