Wednesday, March 2, 2016

A little speed bump along the way

Sometimes when you are in the zone, and everything seems to come together like the perfect souffle, a small wrench is thrown into the well oiled cogs of your work (picture said 'perfect souffle' deflating like a... err use imagination pls!)  .  It could be family, an accident,  illness , even your pet.  What ever it is, the human side in us tends to stress and worry about it and everything else seems secondary.

I didn't bake these choc souffle myself,

but I sure helped eating them!
 Yes I've gone through those moments, in 2004 my late husband was diagnosed with lung cancer and later that year died in my arms, my teen son fell off our second floor balcony in 2008 and broke his pelvis in 3 places, and this week, my father is facing the C word. 

I love the concept of throwing yourself into your work to drown out the noise of the outside world and all that it entails ( a pair of really good BnO headphones and your fave music playlist also works!) however reality is such that we have to deal with it.  So how do you compartmentalise your feelings in order to get on with your life?  If you're like me, it takes a couple of days to digest and finally understand all angles of the problem,  then I mull it over and tend to stay in my head until I'm resolved with whatever issue has come up.  Because when you really think about it and yes it's a cliche but a truism, what will worrying do for you? (Believe me as a Virgo, my worrying is on another level altogether!)

My son and my mother doing just fine thank you!
Well for starters, it can cause a myriad of things beginning with stress which leads to panic attacks, hives, depression and this wonderful list goes on.  I recently went through something similar just before Christmas.  Everything was beginning to pile up on my shoulders, my finances, work plus friends were in town for a holiday, I was flying from one state to another helping out with events, and on the final day of what was supposed to be a girly escape I came down with chest pains so bad I thought that this was it.  As it turned out , I was having a stress attack (very similar to a panic or anxiety attack) and as my Acupuncturist says, if I didn't take it easy,  a lot worse could begin to manifest itself by way of aches/pains and eventually illness.   It certainly was a wake up call,  and I'm not ready to leave just yet!  If you think about it "worrying" is just a waste of brain power which can be utilised elsewhere .. like dreaming! which is a hell of a lot more positive then fretting about "IF's".

It is one of the reasons I always reiterate "follow your dreams"  or "passion" or "what you love", because these things can also save you.  For me, gearing down is hard but I have to do it, I've stopped pushing so hard and working against the current.  Now I go with the flow, make adjustments when needed, writing my Blog and doing my Vlog gives me pleasure.  It's a great way of also expressing myself.  When I do the things I have a passion for, more creative ideas come to me.  Hence the new concept for another show, plus an exhibition I'll be planning for a friend, some great new shopping ideas (and so much for gearing down! heh heh).  I make time for me, I've learned to say no, and be selfish with my "me" time.  I took a few days to figure out our family crisis, talk to my closest friends and family and I'm dealing with it.  Funnily enough with this type of attitude, my work is better, I have more time to spend with my family especially now that we're in a bit of a scrum to see which way the ball will go with my father.

Yes, life will be like a yoyo at times with these little "wrenches" , but if you keep your eye on the ball, stay focused, be flexible and be very positive, those speed bumps are just that, a little bump along the way. Don't be so hard on yourself, and as my dad says "Don't crumble, never let the enemy see your weakness, stay strong and hold your head up"  (errr Dad's ex military..)

Dad with his horses, I always thought he was more gaucho!
So for any of you who's going through some tough times, take it from me it will get better, we're all in this together.    Here's to life.

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